Over the weekend, someone really close to us lost someone close to them. Losing someone is always hard. Even though I never really knew this person too well, it brought me to tears. Having lost my sister so suddenly a few years ago, death affects me a little differently now then it had before. Seeing people we love so much dealing with all those issues first hand really brings back all the memories of dealing with myself. And honestly I work pretty hard to repress them. Planning a wedding when someone who is extremely important to you is not there makes it difficult. I am one of those people who tries to just compartmentalize those feelings. I have a box in my mind for those feelings and try my hardest to keep it locked.
But remembering that my sister won’t be here to share in our special day is hard. It makes me thankful everyday that I did make the mistake of getting married the first time. Knowing that my sister was able to be my bridesmaid even if it wasn’t a marriage that lasted makes it easier to take. It’s not easy, but knowing she is with me in spirit (probably making fun of everything I’m doing because she REALLY enjoyed doing that) helps me. Knowing that she had the opportunity to meet FI, and that she approved also helps. I want to find some way to honor her at the wedding, but determining how is kind of like walking on a tight wire: it’s not easy to find a way to honor your lost loved ones but keeping with the happy atmosphere. There needs to be a way to celebrate their memory, without mourning the loss and changing the mood of the event.
Thanks to Google and Pinterest I have found many options to honor her memory,
Photo Via Jennifer Schumacher Photography
Photo via Von Wedding Films
Shoe Photo Charms
I guess I just need to decide how exactly I want to honor my sister since there seem to be a few tasteful options out there.
Are you honoring any lost loved ones at your wedding? How have you decided to include their memory in your special day?